Carbs & Rec: Insanely Good Messy Brownie Bites

September 6th, 2014 1:33 pm by Kelly Garbato

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I would like to be president someday, so no, I’ve not smoked marijuana. I ate a brownie once at a party in college. It was intense. It was kind of indescribable, actually. I felt like I was floating. Turns out there wasn’t any pot in the brownie.
It was just an insanely good brownie.
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I won’t lie: for a second or two (or sixty), I was super-tempted to recycle my not-pot brownies (of VeganMoFo 2012 fame) for this post. I mean, they’re kind of perfect, right? The thyme looks like marijuana, but it totally isn’t! But because I’m not a cheater and (perhaps more to the point) those brownies didn’t photograph particularly well, I decided to make an all-new recipe instead.

I kind of wish I’d went with option A, y’all.

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In theory, the Mini-Rocky Road Brownie Bites from Betty Goes Vegan sound epically awesome: individual, mini-cupcake-shaped brownie bites stuffed with mini Dandies marshmallows, chocolate chips, and roasted peanuts, each with its own crispy round edges and delightful muffin tops.

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Artfully arranged with the least scrappy of the bunch on top.
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In practice? They made me cry. And not in a good way.

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So you’re supposed to bake them in greased cupcake or mini-cupcake pans. No liners, just baking spray. I should have listened to my gut when it told me what a bad idea this was. I think my small intestine’s exact words were, “I won’t let you shit for a week if you go ahead with this obviously stupid plan!”

Surprise, surprise. Every brownie bite stuck to the pans. All 48 of the minis, plus the 11 regular-sized ones that I made with the overflow batter.

We tried everything: loosening them with knives, with toothpicks, with spoons. Freezing and half-freezing them in hopes that they’d hold together better. All to no avail.

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I actually went troubleshooting online and found that I’m not the only one who had this problem. I also located the original recipe online where, weirdly enough, Annie used liners to bake her brownies…yet recommends against it, for reasons unspecified. I guess because you get crisper edges? Which really doesn’t help if they’re stuck to the pan, forever lost. Le sigh.

The Mini-Rocky Road Brownie Bites are heartbreakers, in that they literally had me on the floor crying, hugging myself and rocking back and forth in frenzied convulsions. Like the mashed potatoes all over again.

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Which is a shame, because the batter is amazing. The baked brownies are good too, though a bit on the cakey-vs-chewy side for me. And even though they’re little more than a bowl of crumbly crumbs, you can bet that I’m still eating them. Just…with a spoon.

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The moral of the story? Listen to your gut. Especially if it’s telling you to use baking liners. Ditto: parchment paper. You really can’t go wrong with either.

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If this fails, always have a pick-me-up puppy waiting in the wings.

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There isn’t a problem big enough that it can’t be solved with silly, sloppy doggy kisses.

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5 Responses to “Carbs & Rec: Insanely Good Messy Brownie Bites”

  1. Jill Says:

    I love your theme! And kudos to you for posting even though they turned out not how you expected. I think they still look good, and would top them with some vegan ice cream!!! yum!

  2. Kelly Garbato Says:

    Aw, thanks. Truthfully I was just too lazy to make them a second time. Also I’m not sure my pants could have handled another batch. As it was we polished these off in about 28 hours. ;)

  3. Jenny Says:

    I am also a huge fan of your theme, especially because not very long ago I began rewatching Parks & Rec from the beginning… I only wonder if you’re going to recreate Ron’s very favorite – Mulligan’s steakhouse – or the dinner Leslie made him for his birthday ;]

    Your graphics are awesome, too.

  4. Kelly Garbato Says:

    Jenny – Oooh, I didn’t even think of those ones! Good call! I think they’d have to extend VeganMoFo by a full month for me to fit everything in. :)

  5. Carbs & Rec: Insanely Good Messy Brownie Bites | The <spb> Says:

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