Mini-Review: Fowl Language: Welcome to Parenting, Brian Gordon (2016)

March 21st, 2016 7:00 am by Kelly Garbato

Naps are objectively the best tho.

three out of five stars

(Full disclosure: I received a free ebook for review through NetGalley.)

Are you a mom or a dad? How wonderful and annoying for you!
Do you know someone who will soon have a baby? How exciting and terrifying for them!
Are your friends parents, too? Of course they are, those poor sons of bitches…

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then FOWL LANGUAGE is for you.
If you answered no, then congratulations, and feel free to sleep in this weekend!

Even though I’m childfree by choice, I picked up a copy of Fowl Language because a) who doesn’t love humorous web comics and b) I have adopted seven dogs over the years and caring for dogs can’t be completely different, right? Like, I’m pretty sure there’s got to be some overlap between asshole kids and asshole dogs.

Exhibit A: the only time my dogs let me sleep in is if the sky’s overcast and their bladders are close to empty. Otherwise I’m up with the sun, or at 2AM for a potty break. Sometimes, with the fosters, I even have to walk them out in the snow wearing nothing but slippers and a hoodie. They just can’t seem to pick the right spot unless I’m there to bear witness. Fun times. (And cats? It’s 4AM, or whenever they’re feeling insufficiently entertained. Shoot me now.)

Exhibits B through I: these comic strips, to which this dog person was totally able to relate.


(Replace “covered in stickers” with “covered in dog hair” and this could be me.)


(Throwing balls with Rennie.)


(All the time.)


(Covertly throw out all the choking hazards.)


(Before you know it, dinner’s at 4PM.)




Okay, that last one had absolutely zilch to do with dogs; it’s just so shiny that I couldn’t resist.

In the vein of Hyperbole and a Half and Adulthood is a Myth, Fowl Language: Welcome to Parenting is a wry web comic about parenting and, occasionally, adulting in general. It’s a little less entertaining than the other two – I chuckled a bit, but didn’t straight-up guffaw like I did with Hyperbole – though I do suspect that parents will get a bigger kick out of it than I did. It would definitely make a cute little gift for new or expecting parents.

(This review is also available on Library Thing and Goodreads. Please click through and vote it helpful if you’re so inclined!)


Comments (May contain spoilers!)

Diversity: The main characters are all birds, so. There are a few socially progressive panels about boys dressing in feminine clothing and explaining “gay” marriage to your kids, though.

Animal-friendly elements: n/a


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