Twenty-One Little Ralphie Things

October 11th, 2018 2:00 pm by Kelly Garbato

2012-10-03 - A lazy afternoon with the dogs - 0002

Dear Ralphie,

I know I’m a day late with this, but cut me some slack, okay? It’s been a pretty stressful week/month/year/decade around here. Mags is maybe-probably dying – or at least really struggling – and I have to deal with selling my house, packing up, and moving back to New York when I should be worrying over her 24/7. (Yup, right back where we started!) Anyway, if you think about it, it’s a tiny miracle that I was able to continue the tradition at all this year. I’m sure there are a million other things I oughta be doing right now.

Anyway, you’ve been on my mind lately. I’ve spent no small amount of time in the local auto shop’s waiting room, and the owners have two dachshunds that they bring to work with them! The more curious of the pair kept me company; I rubbed my clothes all over her to keep my doggos jealous and on their toes. It worked as planned with Rennie and Finnick, but Mags really couldn’t have cared less. She knows where she stands. (Right on top of me, if that is her wish.)

I miss you, bud, but I’m also glad you got to go first. These have not been happy times, and you got out while the getting was good. Lucky goose. I still miss you anyway. Shine a little light my way if you can, okay? I mean, assuming part of you is now a star. We could sure use it down here.

Love you. Wish this was more upbeat. Next year, maybe?

Forever yours,

Mom

Sunday Afternoon

 

Twenty-One Little Ralphie Things

  • That beautiful red fur. (I wish my hair was that color!)

    2008-03-11 - Dogs Outside - 0096 [1024x768]

    2003-10-10 - RalphieBDay-006

    2012-12-04 - Ralphie - 0004

  • His musk. “Ralphie stink.” eau de Ralphie.

    2007-06-28 - Dirty Ralphie - 0004

    2009-12-01 - Ralphie Pizza - 0006

  • My Other Boyfriend ™.

    2002-06-17 - Kelly&RalphieAtTheGame-0019

    2002-09-02 - WhiteLake-Day04Shot139 - Hiking-Kelly&Ralphie

    2006-09-24 - RevisitingFairport-0049 [modified-square2]

  • How he tears up chunks of dirt by mouth when he’s digging (and especially excited).

    2006-12-06 - MuddyRalphie-0003

    2011-04-13 - Ralphie & Rennie Digging - 0026

  • Always insisting on licking my hands when I’m trying to use the keyboard.

    2012-05-27 - Patio Office - 0012

  • Ears!

    2004-01-11 - RalphieTire2-010

    2012-09-12 - Ralphie - 0003

    2006-09-24 - RevisitingFairport-0044

  • His prematurely white snout.

    2006-12-26 - Ralphie (Croc Hunter) - 0012

    2007-02-04 - Opening X-Mas Presents - 0118

    2012-09-24 - Outside with the Dogs - 0011

    He grew into it, okay.

  • Stubborn, just like mom.

    2007-12-05 - Cpt Ralphie's Booty - 0022

    2006-12-02 - RalphieFestivus-0011

    2011-10-07 - Ralphie - 0003>

  • Panty-chewing underwear thief!

    2001-Summer - Ralphie'MightyDog'

  • Trying to hump dogs three times his size.

    2003-11-28 - Mike&Dogs-002

    Or just his size, in lieu of.

    2005-08-01 - RalphiePeedeeORen-0026

    And also vice versa.

    2006-09-30 - PM-Kaylee&JayneMake5-0308

  • How he only plays with toys when another dog shows an interest in them. What a jerk!

    2004-03-25 - PreyTime-009 [1024x768]

    2004-03-25 - PreyTime-027 [1024x768]

    2004-03-25 - PreyTime-030 [1024x768]

  • The superhair that used to grow under his armpit.

    2011-02-21 - Dogs! - 0024

    (I’m afraid we plucked it to death!)

  • Paws like paddles.

    2011-09-11 - Another Afternoon Sunbathing - 0126

    2012-10-03 - A lazy afternoon with the dogs - 0037

    2012-05-27 - Ralphie - 0005

  • Ralphie + Shadow 4ever!

    2002-01-13 - Ralphie&ShadowPlaying - Shot18 [1024x768]

    2002-09-01 - WhiteLake-02-039

    DogJoy Cover 2

  • Nighttime snuggles.

    2003-02-12 - RalphieKellyBed03

    2007-12-22 - Kelly & the Babies - 0014

    2003-09-19 - KellyRalphie&Peedee-04

    And occasionally daytime, too.

  • Digging for squirrels in trees.

    2006-05-11 - RalphieDigging0004

    2007-08-26 - Dogs Outside - 0050

    2007-08-26 - Dogs Outside - 0065

    Wrong direction, goober!

  • That silly little game where I’d bat and slap the area in front of him with my hands and he’d kinda sorta pounce on them, but without actually moving his body – instead it was just the two of us slapping at each other, making little whoof whoof noises.

    Sadly I don’t have any photos of this, so instead here’s a video of Ralphie attempting to pick my pocket of tissue with his ridiculous t-rex arms. Enjoy.

  • His ginormous (metaphorical) balls. He was always friendly enough towards strange dogs, but if they showed him any sass, he was not afraid to take a motherfucker down. Or try, anyway; his damn woman (that would be me) was always getting in the way.

    2006-12-26 - Ralphie and Rennie - 0017

    2006-12-26 - Ralphie and Rennie - 0011

    Like that time he cornered a badger in the shed and it took an oversized push broom to break them apart.

  • How hard he rocked the one-eyed wiener dog look (and just generally took the loss of one eye in stride, much better than his hoomans).

    2013-01-22 - Ralphie - 0017

    2011-10-09 - Ralphie's (pre-) Birthday Dig - 0005

    2012-03-14 - Dogs Outside - 0056

  • His ineffectual little t-rex arms.

    2013-02-23 - Ralphie - 0010

    2002-02-04 - Ralphie&ShadowPlaying - Shot07

    2004-08-06 - RalphieTop-006 [1024x768]

    Dear Syfy,

    I have two words for you: Wienersaurus Rex. YOU’RE WELCOME.

  • How, later in life, he insisted that we all get ready for bed at 9PM, and got grumpy if I failed to comply.

  • ###

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