VeganMoFo, Day 13: What do vegan zombies eat?

Tuesday, October 13th, 2009

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GRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSS!

Sorry. Cheesy, I know. But it’s been a long, frustrating day, and for some odd reason, this tired old joke always elicits a grin.

Anyway, I don’t know about you, but I could use a fun, fluffy post. And what’s more fun and fluffy than vegan Halloween candy? (That’s a rhetorical question. There is nothing funner or fluffier than vegan Halloween candy. Nothing. Nada. Zero. Zip. Zilch. Rien. Nichts. Niente. Niets. I said good day!)

The way I see it, vegan Halloween candy can be separated into two groups: the cheap, readily available, accidentally vegan stuff that you keep on hand for trick-or-treaters, and the expensive, hard-to-find, specialty goodies, which are oftentimes veganized versions of old, pre-vegan favorites.

Not that the two groups are mutually exclusive, of course – if you’re over the age of 12, probably you don’t consume candy on a daily basis. Thus, a fistful of dark chocolate Peanut Chews or a mile’s worth of Fruit by the Foot is indeed a special treat, pedestrianism be damned. And that’s okay! You don’t need to drop a small fortune on gourmet vegan foodstuffs to Kenneth Lay out this Halloween. On the flip side, if you do sit atop a small mountain of money, all Scrooge McDuck stylie, feel free to distribute gourmet vegan goodies which proudly proclaim their veganism all over the mofo packaging, in a sneaky guerrilla effort to lure some of the neighborhood children over to the light side. But toss in vegan literature at your own risk – ‘twould be very un-vegan to wake up to an egg-covered landing on November 1st!

(And yes, I am assuming that everyone reading celebrates Halloween, because if you don’t, you should! Between the candy, the costumes, the pumpkin carving, the hay rides, and the horra movies, everyone should be able to find at least one aspect of the holiday worth consecrating!)

What follows are two lists of vegan candies; the everyday stuff is vegan per PETA, so take these with a grain of salt – there be some rumblings on the internets re: the accuracy of PETA’s “accidentally vegan” list. Also, I’ve only included candy here; for party snacks, please refer to the original list.

The gourmet vegan goodies, on the other hand, come from firsthand knowledge and the product inventory in vegan-owned online shops, so mistakes in these listings are much less likely.

So, what are your Halloween plans, my lovely vegan zombies? The Mr. and I have a longstanding (read: four years, maybe five) tradition – we spend the day watching horror movies, relaxing with the dogs, and chowing on all sorts of vegan junk food. Pizza, spring rolls, french fries, cupcakes, turnovers, ice cream, pop corn, candy, brownies, soda, liquor – ah, that’s the life!

2007-10-19 - Ralphie the Pumpkin - 0030

I’ve been dying to dress my dachshund kid up in a hot dog outfit to entertain the trick-or-treaters, but we literally have not had a single one since moving to the Midwest – all of our residences have been so rural.

On the plus side, no interruptions during the movies!
 
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Rachachuros Seasoning, Redux: Zombie Cannibal "Meat"!

Tuesday, April 21st, 2009

As a follow-up to last week’s Sexy Meat post, I bring you another series of advertisements for Rachachuros Seasoning.

(Courtesy of Ben at Suicide Food, who covered these ads last year. Timely, I am not.)

Rachachuros Seasoning - Chicken 2

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